ALEPPO'S CHILDREN

I'm not sure when the world will be free of cruel despots, religious zealots, militant politicians, and despicable arms dealers, but it can not be soon enough (as always). While so much attention is being paid on the next president, it helps to put it all into a more realistic perspective.

After graduating from a seminary that has long ago disavowed any knowledge of me, I must admit that very little stuck. But the one thing that did stick is Jesus saying, "Suffer the little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for such is the kingdom of heaven." (Mt 19:14) No matter how you interpret this verse, it is obvious that we're a long way off from its fulfillment.

GOING HOME

I still call the place where I haven't lived in 40 yrs "back home." If you're lucky, you have a place that is indelibly imprinted in every part of your being, no matter how far away you have wandered from it. I've spent time wondering what it would be like if I stayed. I made several decisions to return but never did. But I do recognize how much that area had to do with my early formation and how easy it is to slip into talking as if I never left.

Now that I'm getting close to the BIG GOING HOME experience, I've been thinking of how much of this world I would really miss. Perhaps it's something like not appreciating something until it's gone. I'd rather think that it's a culmination of all things or maybe my denouement. I am earthly. I like water, dirt, trees, rocks, sky and just about every other part of the creation. I even like the world of man - parts of anyway. I loved to ski and ride motorcycle, to go to good restaurants and bad bars, to go to midnight mass and to stock car races, to go on road trips and to sleep in the back yard; I loved to go to the mountains and to the sea, to shop in small towns and find places to buy real cider; I loved doing most anything with friends and how relatives became even more important as time went on, to cook a favorite meal and to watch a favorite TV show, and so much more. 

You can guess then that the idea of getting heavenly as heaven is usually thought doesn't appeal to me very much. I like it here just find - even with all that one has to put up to do so. But I can imagine taking away the wars, the politics, the poverty, the disease, the hate, the ignorance, the greed, the pain, the disasters and the like. For me, it would be heaven on earth. So I'm negotiating for a cabin in the woods howbeit a twenty-room cabin by a lake. If more is offered, a speedway would be nice with Danica Patrick to race against and perhaps a bar like "Sloppy Joe's" where I could talk with Ernest Hemingway about why he committed suicide. I wouldn't want more because that would be overdoing. 

Streets of gold are not for me. Give me a good old pre-Walmart home town USA with a 5&10, a diner, a one screen movie theater, a place to buy art supplies, a pool hall, a hardware and of course an auto parts store along with all the noted features that make up a good life. Or just about any town in the Twilight Zone series where the main character was tired of the way it was and wanted to return to what they knew growing up. So I guess I better add a carousel and a bandstand that are in a park with a really interesting water fountain. 

Going home can take on many imaginations. Everyone can remember the nostalgic longing and increased anticipation of nearing home after being away for a while, especially when there was the chance of never seeing it again. But if the next life isn't exactly as I would like it, I rather doubt if I'm going to ask if there is anything else available. Those with confirmed reservations are likely to get the best locations. I'm prepared not to be one of the elect, but it would be really great if I was seen as an also ran. I'd like to think I earned it by making God laugh. ....At least a couple of times. 

NASCAR SPIRITUALITY

There has been ...several, actually many who claim a particular sport or physical activity gives spiritual insight and personal growth. From surfing to cross training, from golf to long distance running, and from martial arts to fishing, they all have been said to have a spirituality that can make your personal faith even more meaningful in a very special way. In NASCAR, we like fast cars, hot women, cold beer, and slow dancing. So you wouldn't think that there was anything spiritual about sitting on a couch or in the stands watching cars go round and round and round and round. But I dare guess there's just as much as is claimed by proponents of other sports.

Who among us hasn't spiritually ran out of gas? Who hasn't run into a spiritual wall at full speed? Who hasn't been let down by their spiritual pit crew? Who hasn't had their spiritual engine lose a cylinder? Or who hasn't had it blow up altogether? Everyone knows how hard it is to get a spiritual victory. It takes time, training, knowledge, commitment, experience and generous support. Seems a lot like a spiritual journey to me.

Granted, I'm talking about sitting on your ass watching drivers who are also sitting on their asses in cars that they complain are too loose or too tight all through the race. Only on rare occasions is the car just the way they want it to be. Mainly because they would then have no excuse for losing the race. The best possible scenario is to win the race with at least 10 things wrong with your car. The fete' is even more impressive if you come from the back of the field after being two laps down as the result of spinning out because of a blown tire, or a gentle nudge from one of your competitors, that caused enough damage to ruin the aerodynamics and overall handling. If there isn't some spiritual insight gained from seeing someone win against so many odds, I'm pretty sure you're just watching for only the wrecks and crashes, especially  "the big one."

Some stereotype spirituality as being calm, quiet, ascetic,  peaceful, introspective, inspirational and far more ethereal than physical. That's all well and good, but I don't think it's that exclusive. I'm one who believes there is a spiritual aspect to all things including evil. Some would argue that some things just aren't that spiritual. And I agree. A landfill doesn't seem that inspirational. Whereas a beautiful sunset makes us stop if only for a moment to take it in. But to have a more complete understanding, it might better be that the sun was setting over a landfill, or something similar.

You might well ask then, "Are you saying that NASCAR spirituality is like a sunset over a landfill?" Yeah, pretty much. It is noise, ill feelings, combativeness, stretching the rules, taking advantage, blocking progress, swearing, malingering, sand bagging, revenge, physical discussions (fights), and temper tantrums as much as it is encouragement, commitment, caring, sharing, endurance, patience, team work, communication, dealing with the unexpected and some faith in life. And like other parts of life, a little luck always helps and never hurts.

For several years NASCAR was growing in relative obscurity. Once the Daytona track was built it began to create interest outside of the southern motherland and eventually the races became to be regularly broadcasted on television. Winston (cigarettes) was the sponsor for mainly years until it was choked out by general well being. But the Confederate flag remained until just recently. The commercial possibilities grew from auto related products to such sponsors as Viagra and Liberty University. I have to be honest, it was mostly redneck and cracker drivers for many years then it expanded to white drivers from other areas of the country. Finally, a female joined the lineup along with other non-white drivers. Some of which rose up through NASCA's diversity program. Other changes like racing at tracks throughout the country both oval and road courses, extremely improved safety, strict regulations, athletic pit crews and continual changes in car dynamics allowed for fans to follow their favorite drivers for many years. I can't say that all of the changes went smoothly but eventually, the contrast between the old and new was quite vivid. I don't think there's any need to point out the spiritual applications.

NASCAR does not race on Easter and Mother's Day. For years, even the hardest living driver knew not to mess with faith or mom. It's strong God, Family and Country ethic is fueled by countless local stock car tracks that offer prayer for safety on the track and in life, the national anthem, close racing with the usual histrionics; good tasting food; loud country music; an announcer you can't hear very well; a lot of dirt, brake dust and exhaust fumes; questionable restrooms; lots of different smells; and of course souvenirs, t-shirts and race photos. But most of all, whether at the smallest track or the biggest track, there's an shared ethos that is distinct even though much is what you would find in many other sports.   


In high school senior English, we were to write a paper about our future. I wrote that I planned to participate in the spectator sport of auto racing. Brian Stallard, the teacher, was somewhat incensed.  Apparently, such was not a legitimate career choice. I don't think he quite understood. There was a driver in every fan and a fan in every driver. But only a few gladiators got to compete in the biggest arenas in the fastest cars. And I had already seen Jimmie Clark, Graham Hill, Jackie Stewart and other famous drivers in person and had seen them race at Watkins Glen which over the years has hosted a variety of racing, including NASCAR. To this day, "Watkins" has been one of my spiritual homes. Auto racing obviously wasn't commonly seen as spiritually meaningful, actually quite the opposite. But some of our spirituality has to be defined in the context of where and how we live, whether you're a gearhead or not.



BONUS PIC

CREDIT: GETTY IMAGES, NASCAR

LIFE IS A PAIR OF DUCKS

"Bless me Father for I have sinned." But not real badly. ...I hope anyway. I can easily drift off, be distracted, lose concentration, get lost in some tangential thought or have a long, involved daydream. Over the years this has improved some but apparently not that much. I can look at one You Tube of those audition shows where everyone wonders why the contestant is there in the first place then they wow the audience and the judges with their amazing voice and soul. Even with knowing that some of this has to be a put on, it's still rather exciting, tearful and memorable. Then of course, I have to watch another one. Four hours later, I start to get a little jaded. It's obvious that a recent death in the family or anything to do with cancer goes a long way. And I have to question why there's always one or two guys in the wing that are rubbing up against the contestant's mother or significant other. You just know there's some real groping when the camera isn't on them.

But this is only one kind of magical moment to get lost in. I love it when someone in the produce section of a grocery store begins to sing a familiar American pop song. That's a special moment in itself but then one by one others join in. And soon the aisles are full of a harmonious sound and dancing. Most of shoppers' faces express unexpected joy and happiness. Some, no doubt, are irritated with the interruption. Probably the last thing they wanted was an encounter with a magic moment. Mass breakouts or flash mobs happen in food courts and churches, at concerts and weddings (I haven't seen one happen at a funeral, but it's only time before one does), and on streets and buses, almost anyplace where the unusual can disrupt the properness of commonality.  

It's just as easy to get lost watching military service people come home early from their last deployment to surprise family, friends or pets. Some of the children's responses can be heartbreaking and so genuine. They may be why I keep watching. Having been in that situation during the Vietnam War, I can better imagine my return home as a surprise. ____But things were different then. I love how pets get so excited when they see their service member after such a long time. Note: it's usually dogs; cats want an explanation for the absence. Thoughts of pets then remind me that there are an endless number of puppy and kitten videos to watch. The cuteness factor is off the chart, but the animal rescue stories are the best. Transformations through love and care are always inspiring signs of hope.

Surprising magical moments, whether real or contrived, are few as compared to the day in and day out routines of life. Sure, there's a spiritual understanding that says ordinary life can be magical and we would do well to be grateful for all the little moments that fill our day. I trust that I never get to the place where sunrises and sunsets are just part of another uneventful day. But even if the many moments of sublimity aren't considered as commonplace, they don't make up for the less than magical realities of life. I mean all of life, not just the little corner that I live in. 

Because the great teacher lived high on a mountain that was far from the village, a young man was sent on the journey to ask him what life was all about, as there was such a dissension amongst the villagers. When he returned, he told them that the great teacher said if they truly wanted to know, they would have to send the oldest man in the village. After along while, the old man finally returned. The villagers excitedly asked what the great teacher said hoping that he had confirmed what they believed. The old man told them the great teacher said that life was a pair of ducks. They immediately asked if the great teacher said anything else. The old man replied, "He said it was the only thing that made sense." With that, the villagers were sad, as no one had picked a pair of ducks to be what life was all about.

MODERNITY AND MATURITY

Punishment for blasphemy is such a moving target. One person's pardon is another person's beheading. The severity involved seems to come from believing that God is offended by disobedience, disrespect, disbelief or distain of sacred teachings, sacred rules, sacred things and sacred persons. Then of course, if God is offended then so should any faithful follower. And this brings them right up against modernity, as have so many other fortressed institutions, ethnocentric cultures, corporate practices, and manipulated justices.

It's hard to maintain a futurist faith when the world with some of the most amazing advances could be done in by primitive religion, sectarian politics, classism, racism and gross disparity. Apparently, cockroaches and some other specialized creatures are the only ones that can survive the destruction of the earth. I can only hope that they then evolve in a more civilized way. 

But first, let us take a moment to appreciate all that some would readily throw away. Even with the tragic natural events, the Earth is a special creation that I am daily in awe of and grateful for. The other thing is the anticipation of how far science can go in discovery and development. I'm pretty happy with what has been accomplished thus far, but in so many ways, we're only at the beginning.

Humans do well in the physical realm, not so great in the mental and emotional realms, and quite poorly in the spiritual realm. (tasks, elements, aspects or something similar could be used just as well) One might theorize that the mental, emotional and spiritual realms need to catch up to the physical in order to best utilize future advances. Such might be problematic to say the least but one area that would help in a big way is maturity. Which usually means doing what is best for all, making the difficult choice, defending the weak and innocent, knowing what needs to be done, keeping on task, changing when needed, admitting that you made a mistake, and accepting that if you get nothing beyond having your basic needs meant that it will be okay with you.

Modernity comes with it's own particular set of problems. But these will be better resolved if we 'really' believe that all humans are created equal. You can't make yourself more equal but many still try. You can make yourself less equal, which many have done but usually deny it. Also, the more we apply the Golden Rule, the more we will appreciate being equal to others. The problem of superiority is active in every area of life. Some might say that's just the way things are. Or, it's a practical way to order society. Funny how intellect, wealth and position along with race and culture are the usual considerations to determine superiority. ...But why? It's rather obvious that those with a pure and clean heart should have been given more attention. But just not automatically assuming that others are inferior by some subjective or learned standard would be a good start. Not killing or assaulting them would be even better.

PRACTICAL MYSTICISM

I would like to think that in most ways, I'm a practical mystic. I don't have to drudge up an encounter with the divine in order to feel good about my place in the universe. In fact, I've wondered if I'm a little too content with the spiritual wonders of creation that occupy my life I see, hear, and feel on a daily basis. Hopefully, I will also that keep in mind how unfathomable and unexplainable the pure essence of God truly is.  But given that I don't pursue extraordinary mystical experiences on a regular basis, I've come to wonder if I'm that much of a mystic or even a practical mystic to begin with. It just might be that I'm plain lazy. So basically, the truth might be that I'm an impractical mystic. I'm not sure. 

I attended Practical Bible Training School. I don't think I ever figured out the practical part. And of course for fun, it at times it was called the Impractical Bible Training School. Either one was good for me. I also worked as an LPN (Licensed Practical Nurse) and often referred to myself as an LIP. But I got it. In that being something practical might be as far as I would get in life. And it pretty much turned out that way. Mainly because I really didn't fit into any place that well. So when I came to mysticism, I never thought I'd be seen any other way. But it doesn't matter anymore. Because the only thing that really matters is how honestly I see myself.

Here are some practical things that I really like or am too lazy to challenge or change.

1. I don't need to know 2 or 3 other languages to get what the Bible really says to me. Besides, those who do don't exactly agree. I'd rather pick what makes some kind of sense or that which leaves me in awe. Life is much too short to worry about anything that doesn't fit into the golden rule.

2. I have Sundays off now. I never miss an early football game or NASCAR race. I can also make my own hymn selections from iTunes, skip taking up the offering, forego the morning sermon and go straight to the coffee hour. However, I do miss The Eucharist.

3. I don't have to say as many Hail Mary's and Our Father's. Apparently, BVM and our father in heaven can hear me the first time. But a few extras don't hurt.

4. I try to maintain a big picture of life and not get bogged down with what is wrong in and out of church. The complete picture includes all the goodness and wonder of creation and my being a creature in it. And sometimes, just being in the presence of that awareness lifts me to amazing heights.

5. My only daily spiritual practice is gratefulness. But if you could hear me swear when my oxygen tube gets caught on something, you would think otherwise. I'm still thankful that there are so many opportunities to appreciate the simple things and to be able to give thanks for all of the abundance in an ordinary day.

6. I can let Jesus be Jesus. I don't have to make him after my own likes and dislikes. It's okay if he doesn't like Neo-Impressionism as much as I do. WWJD? is often asked. I don't have to answer the question. I know that's being rather lazy. But for me, it's better than being so absolute about which political party he would join.

7. I don't have to convince anyone else of the error of their way or the rightness of mine. I believe that differences will work themselves out, even the ones that seem immoveable. Of course, there's always the chance that new differences will arise.

8. One of the best things is having no food restrictions. I just love pork and other evil delights. I can think of some foods that "ought" to be banned though. But under the Religious Freedom Restoration Act I only have to eat them at same sex weddings. In addition, there's no mandatory fasting, even though once and a while wouldn't hurt.

9. I can laugh. You might say, "Well, of course you can." But so many know laughing about the sacred is looked down on, sternly dealt with or even punished. I can laugh or make light because so many claims of understanding the divine are rather imperfect. Laughing shows us how far we have fallen short.

10. Couldn't think of a 10th one, so 9 it is.

I believe, and you certainly don't have to, we all are on these amazing spiritual journeys that can differ in almost every way but are headed toward the same goal. This can put you in unexpected places, at unexpected times, with unexpected people. Some don't have to go very far to accomplish the goal or complete the journey; others will have traveled great distances in order to do the same thing. I would only say that the externals of the journey don't equal the internals. You cannot tell where a person is at by appearance or presupposition. ...As practical or as impractical as that may seem.

INNER LIFE

Ever since I was kid and had any awareness of it, I always thought the inner life of thoughts, feelings, emotions, fears, desires, dialogues, memories and whatever else makes up our internal selves was rather odd. What was it all about? I wondered if my dog had the same inner activity. In a way, I liked to think that he did. Back then, it basically came down to feeling good or feeling bad. When feeling bad, I couldn't wait to get back to feeling good. Which, more often than not, was getting off the naughty list anyway way I could. But later on, I realized this inner thing was a great place to hide the stuff I didn't want anyone to ever know about. If I lied and didn't get caught at it, only I would know the truth. I was likely a little sociopathic but not so much as to dismiss guilt, shame and culpability. I planned to deal with any eternal consequences later on. 

Beyond concealing the unacceptable, there was an increased wonder as to my inner attraction to nature. For me there was nothing better. Then later on, there were plenty of other things to wonder about. There was a world to explore or a cosmos if you have a really good imagination or a big ass telescope. In contrast to this ultimate outer reality, I heard that our inner space was as vast as outer space. Perhaps it was only meant to be a statement on our neglect of inner selves, but I was inclined to believe that it was true in some ways. At my worst and at my best, I realized that there was still more there. As uncomfortable as that was and how I usually returned to a more familiar orientation as soon as possible, I knew I had more exploring to do. 

So, it was even more a wonder why so much of my inner life was limited to my usual and very familiar place from where most actions in and reactions to the outer world occurred.  This could easily be an inner center but I was surprised by all that it dealt with or brought to the fore. Like those embarrassing moments that were stuck in our crawls ...as it where. We apparently don't remember things as they really happened. Which might mean that we're the only one consumed by a particular ignorant behavior or faux pas. The question then is why out of so many embarrassing moments, regrettable interactions and awkward situations, it was those distinct few that continue to repeat and repeat with the rush of shame. But that was only a small part of the inner construct that can with computer precision process a lot of complicated material. 

It's a little strange to write about something that you need in order to write or do most everything else. Even more interesting to me are the constant dialogues and soliloquies that can fluctuate from thoughtful introspection to deranged entertainment. Typically, we run mental pro and con lists, revisit arguments in search of better comebacks, entertain fantasies, cheerlead a faltering enthusiasm, and are endlessly gleeful over accomplishments big or small. Sometimes, it gets pretty busy in there. Sometimes, we're overwhelmed with worry and fear, sometimes with sensation and desire.

At times, I've felt trapped in a juggernaut that was out of control. At other times, I've felt a deep inner peace that came from a most re-assuring connection to a spiritual universe. Most of the time however, I'm feeling the push and pull of living in world that considers the lives of the rich and famous to be more important than the various forms of disposable humanity which mostly consist of women and children.

So many times I've heard that something was taken out of context. But more often than not, those contexts were rather limited. Perhaps life is supposed to be an ever-expanding context and that's why we are only willing to take it so far. The full context is quite uncomfortable and forbids us to live in our little worlds were we are content with a fabricated cover that explains how everything goes together. It is only in the fullest context of hate, starvation, war, inhumanity, greed, and, and murder as well as love, kindness, generosity, peace, compassion, and caring that questions can even begin to be fully answered. And where human worth can start be measured by smiles of recognition, hugs of acceptance and handshakes of sincerity instead of by position, wealth, education, looks, skin color, talents, religion, or the number of friends on Facebook.

If we never say anything, our worst and our best can be well hidden. But how much of that lies behind the ills of the world. How much does racism, superiority, power, position, greed and privilege play in the inability to address the worlds ills? But how many times have good intentions failed, been abused or had other agendas? How many have given up on making any difference citing too many complications, too much opposition, or too many disappointments? How many have adopted a winners and losers philosophy believing that's just the way things are? ....Or perhaps, the more we understand about our inner world the more we will the outer one. And that just might make a difference.